Sunday, 8 December 2019

Rahul The Magician

Updated: October 23, 2015 10:30 am

THE entertaining magician that Rahul Gandhi is, he has again presented an enjoyable mystery wrapped in a riddle encased in an enigma. One fine day he just vanished into thin air. It was a Paisa-Vasool show that Satiricus enjoyed. But, alas, not the BJP boors. Those silly spoil-sports indecently insisted on asking—where did he vanish? Why did he vanish? For their kind information the Congress revealed that their vice-president had gone to some American city called Aspen to attend a get-together of “global leaders” in various fields ranging from politics and finance to sports and arts and what have you.

Satiricus was duly impressed, and of course if he does not know in which one of these areas Rahul Gandhi is a global leader, he has only his journalistic ignorance to thank for it. Maybe Rahul’s reputed expertise is in the area of how to lose elections, his dazzling knowledge of Indian history relates to ancient Hindus’ wretched growth rate of poverty masquerading as prosperity, and his reported reputed degree in business management from Cambridge university gives him invaluable insight on how to handle his petty cash of two billion dollars parked in a Swiss stash.

While in all such sundry areas Rahul’s global leadership makes us adoring Indians proud, what was internationally amazing was to secretly attend an international conference when there was no conference. If the boorish BJPian sare to be believed, the Aspen conference was not held from September 24 to 26, as claimed by the Congress, but was already over in June 25 to July 4, and then maliciously mischievously asked—Had Rahul travelled back in time? In righteous retort Rahul put out a photo showing him sitting among a crowd in some room. That, he said, was him sitting in the Aspen conference. Well, so he says, so how can it be not, says Satiricus. Still Satiricus wonders—Do global leaders meet secretly? And if not, why did Rahul have to go to an open conference so secretly? Oh, well, Satiricus is a lowly local fellow, how can he know Rahul’s global secrets?

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