A Fiendish Explanation
India That Is Bharat
SECULAR SATIRICUS has a communal fiend for a friend. The other day he came to Satiricus with a fiendish grin and said, “Did you read it in the papers? Rahul Gandhi has been exposed as a crypto-Hindu!” Shocked Satiricus stared at him. Had the fellow gone crazy? “My dear dimwit,” Satiricus said to him, “have you forgotten that Rahul had once said RSS was as bad as SIMI ?Have you also forgotten that sometime back Rahul had publicly ridiculed and condemned ancient India’s Hindu rate of growth of poverty pretending to be prosperity ? Does this not prove Rahul’s sterling credentials as a secularist?”
“All that must have been for show,” the friend asserted. “Deep down, Rahul’s secret links with Hinduism go back to hoary history.” Still more shocked, Satiricus said, “What is your proof of your nonsense ?” “The proof, fella, is that not long back Rahul was caught doing Vipassana in some shrine during his travels. In fact, as reported by an admiring secular paper, he was so immersed in it that he had to be shaken awake after quite some time.” “So what?” Satiricus said. “Vipassana is Buddhist meditation, and did not Buddha found Buddhism as a revolt against Vedic Hinduism?”
That should have demolished the communal cuss’s queer claim. Alas, it did not. He said, “Buddha was born a Hindu and died a Hindu.” Satiricus was aghast, and exclaimed, “How can you say such a stupid thing?” He retorted, “The credit of this stupidity goes to Dr. Radhakrishnan – he said that!He even said Buddha had such great reverence for Yajna (Sacrifice), the focal point of Vedic Hinduism, that he said Yanna (Yajna) was mahāphlo (of great benefit), and “the gods are pleased” with its performance.
Oh, my secular God! Does that mean all Indian isms are basically Hinduism – including Indian secularism? Or will Sonia again join hands with Shahi Imam to save this ism from becoming a wasm?