Ignorance Is A Bliss!
INDIA THAT IS BHARAT
MY LORD, to be or not to be, that is the question—for Satiricus. For Satiricus is a Hindu. He was born of Hindu parents, so he didn’t have much of a choice. But now that he knows what’s what and what’s not, especially since your illuminating piece revealed to him what “Being a Hindu” means, he is feeling—what? What was that you said? Oh, yes, yes—”divided”, even “fragmented”. Blessed by your lordly learning, this ignoramus now knows that being a Hindu he is required to feel divided and fragmented and fractionated and broken down into pieces. And that, my Lord, was why Satiricus’s opening question, to be or not to be—a Hindu. The only way he sees towards holy wholeness is to follow in your footsteps, abandon Hinduism, and embrace secularism. That will also have an attractive additional advantage—he can preserve and profess his professional ignorance, especially the ignorance that is a must for a columnist writing anything about Hindus for India’s English press—as you, my Lord, have been doing week in and week out.
Even then Satiricus must humbly admit that his poor ignorance may be no match for your illustrious ignorance. For starters, you condemn the Gita (safely behind Ambedkar’s name), but you do not know even simple Sanskrit, which would have helped you to see the basic difference between “Varna” and “Jāti”. Consequently you do not know that Varna Vyavasthā of the Gita meant a functional division of an organised society.—a concept which almost every organized society in the world borrowed from India. You do not know that Lord Rama from the north went down to the very end of India in the south and worshipped Ishwar there, giving the spot the name Rameshwar. You do not know (or choose to forget) that mass conversion of Hindus was done not by Muslims but by cheats called missionaries. And to cap it all, when you talk of the liberating influence of English education, you again choose to forget Macaulay’s own words—that the English education was not meant for liberating any Indian class but for enslaving the minds of all Indians so that your fellow-Britishers could rule them. See, my Lord? Can Satiricus’s professional ignorance compete with such all-round ignorance? If not, why not? Because, my Lord, you yourself proudly proclaim that when you write, you are “out of your mind”.