Thy Name Is Jesus
India that is Bharat
IT TAKES all sorts of weird communalists to make the world, it seems to secularist Satiricus. For on the heels of the news of some weirdos in UP regularly reading the Bible but at the same time insisting that they remain Hindus comes the news that an IAS officer in Tamil Nadu is “spreading the word of Jesus” but says, “I am not a Christian, I am a disciple of Jesus.” Well, now, if Satiricus cannot understand how a “disciple of Jesus” Christ cannot but be a Christian, he has to thank his underdeveloped understanding for it. At the same time, curiosity being the core of journalism, as journalist Khushwant Singh once said, journalist Satiricus is curious about why, after this government officer conducted 850 Christian prayer meetings all over the state, the Tamil Nadu government should now ask him to stop his “preaching and propagating activities”. As per Satiricus’s secular sensibilities this order exposes the numerical height of official ignorance of Jesus.
Unfortunately for Jesus and this disciple of his, this ignoble ignorance prevails not only among official ignoramuses of Tamil Nadu but all over hopelessly Hindu India, and—believe it or not—even among scholars of Christianity in the Christian west. Take, for starters, this stupid question—who is this Jesus whose word this learned latter-day disciple is diligently spreading? Why, “Jesus of Nazareth”, stupid, the said officer may righteously reply, pointing to a book by a Pope with that title. Well, now, Satiricus does know a place called Nazareth, but was it there where and when Jesus was said to have been born? The Dead Sea Scrolls are not sure. On the contrary, according to these scrolls found in the caves of Qumran on the shores of the Dead Sea in Palestine, the pre-Christian Jew followers of Moses and upholders of the ‘Law of Moses’ were called Nazorene, meaning “Zealots for the Law”, and Jesus was one such Nazorene. Then what about Nazareth? The wretched reply of Rajaram, a cussed chronicler of Christianity: Nazareth, considered today as Jesus’s birth-place, probably came into existence much later, and has nothing to do with Jesus—“assuming Jesus was a historical figure”.
Jesus Christ! What a hellish, heinous, Hindu heresy! Could there be anything more abominably anti-Christ? Alas, there can, there is. For this wretched Rajaram is not alone in this abomination, he seems to be just a part of a widespread conspiracy that is very much alive despite its Dead Sea origin. For researchers like John Allegro and Dupont-Sommer have cussedly concluded from these scurrilous scrolls that Jesus probably never lived! Secular Satiricus is shell-shocked. Could anything else be as bad as this? No, not as bad, it can be worse. For a European researcher by name Wells has written a whole book titled Did Jesus Exist? To cap it all, even the legacy of the original Doubting Thomas of the Bible seems to go on and on. For there is yet another book giving a long list of names of European Christian thinkers of the past 200 years who have questioned the historicity of Jesus.
On the other hand there are those unholy historians of the Holy Bible who trace trifles like timelines and ask, why only one Jesus Christ? Why not more Jesus Christs the merrier? Look at the dates, they say. Jesus Christ the Messiah was supposedly crucified during the time of the Roman emperor Tiberius, but later, during the time of emperor Claudius there was a political activist known as Chrestus, because of whose rebellious activities the Jews of Rome had been expelled from the city. That makes two Christs—and to that, for good measure, Rajaram adds one more, saying a third Christ may have been responsible for the “Jesus in India” stories. What does all this numerical nonsense mean? So far as Satiricus can figure out the situation, it means either there was not even one Jesus Christ, or there were as many as three Jesus Christs.
Finally, if there was only one Jesus, why spread only one word of his? Perhaps this officer was too busy to find more than one, so herewith a small selection for his kind attention: “The true work of God is belief in Jesus.” (John, 6:29) “These enemies of mine that did not want me to become king over them, bring here and slaughter them before me.” (Luke: 19:27) “He that hath no sword, let him sell his garment and buy one.”
(Luke: 22:36) “Do not think I came to put peace upon the earth; I came to put, not peace, but war.” (Mathew, 10:34) “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters….he cannot be my disciple”.
See, Mr. Latter-day Disciple of Jesus? This is “the word of Jesus”. So when are you going to start hating your father and mother?