Monday, 25 May 2020

‘Faking News’ That Could Become Reality

Updated: September 27, 2014 1:25 pm

 

It’s funny anyway and makes one realise that many of us are affected as described in the Faking News. The item is too witty and reflects our feelings so well that it has to be reproduced. Who knows it might become a reality, the way the News hour on Times Now is getting more and more a programme of shouters with Arnab Goswami trying to silence the combatants out—shouting all his panellists. It is both sad and funny to see Vinod Mehta keeping his finger up to attract Arnab’s attention, but getting nowhere.

The Newshour of Times Now is not for weak hearts and bad throat. The Faking News informs that the incomparable mediator of Times Now’s debates Arnab Goswami could end up as the best palliative for sufferers of low blood pressure—sometimes which is more risky than high blood pressure. According to the report gone haywire on the net, a 35-year-old man suffering from low blood pressure was prescribed daily dose of Arnab’s Newshour on Times Now by his doctor. The advice was a last attempt by the doctor to try and cure his patient. He had tried all possible drugs and diet control for six months but everything failed to normalise the blood pressure of the patient. “We tried lots of things. We gave him most advanced and concentrated form of medicines. We even showed him Dhoni’s last ball chases where he deliberately waste time, but nothing worked,” the doctor’s compounder told Faking News. So, this was last attempt to help his patient.

It is said, after a few evenings of watching the programme the patient thanked several panellists including Sanjay Jha for improving his blood pressure. Likewise the doctor, encouraged by the curative effect of watching Newshour, could now try to cure high profile patients suffering from high BP.

“Almost all your regular panellists on the show are patients of high blood pressure. They regularly consult or call me after they have participated. Not only this, many of the regular viewers of the show too have high BP,” the doctor revealed.

However for instant results, doctor has advised patient to watch debates featuring Sanjay Jha. “For some reason if the unnecessarily high tempers, heated and loud atmosphere on the show, doesn’t help in increasing the BP, I am quite sure the arguments of Sanjay Jha and his standard response of ‘Arnab let me answer very quickly that in 2002 Gujarat riots’ to anything that is asked, will surely excite the patient,” doctor said confidently.

“And if even that doesn’t help, then I will be trying through my contacts in media industry to somehow get him as a panellist on the show itself. If not watching, participating will surely cure him,” the doctor added.

Meanwhile, taking a cue from this unique style of treatment, a neurologist today asked his patients with paralysed hands to watch debates featuring Mani Shankar Aiyar. “I will surrender my practising license if even after watching Aiyar, those patients don’t get up and move their hands to throw some object on their TV,” the physician declared.


Government Has Changed, Mod’s Attitude Hasn’t


The retired Army officers, from Lt. generals to colonels, even those who do not feel very kindly towards Gen. VK Singh, former COAS and now a minister in Modi government, have started murmuring that their hope that the Super babus in the Ministry of Defence (MoD) would have changed with the change in the government, These officers would have to be subservient to the IAS babus and obey the commands, even ‘suggestions’ from MoD.

This has affected the Army and especially in equipping the forces with weapons and equipments needed for defending the country on two borders. The tussle between the MoD and the generals over what is needed and from which manufacturers, inordinately delays. All this affects India’s defence preparedness.

The MoD also selects judges for the Armed Forces Tribunal (AFT) which then creates the suspicion that babus choose the ones who would do their likes and dislikes.

Hoping that Prime Minister Narendra Modi, whose reputation is that he dares to radically changes conventions gone rotten, two former officers made few suggestions. Former Colonel AJ Bahadur suggested that the three services headquarters be integrated to replace the insensitive MoD, which has been turned into their Empire by the babus. The three Service Chiefs should be empowered for all aspects of operational readiness, administration and maintenance. They report directs to the Prime Minister. Another suggestion is to appoint a Chief of Defence Staff, who will in rank have parity with the Cabinet Secretary.


Dynasty Blocking Resurrection Of Congress?


The squabble between loyalists of Sonia Gandhi and the comrades of Rahul Gandhi, whose spirit of adventurism ruined Rahul and the party, one is reminded of Indira and Rajiv Gandhi.

Their animus against each other was very obvious and was believed to be real. But one was told by a very perceptive, A. R. Antulay, that the mother and son were one and there was no difference between them. The façade of feud between their advisers was a political necessity. If Indira Gandhi did not want to accede to some request by someone close to her, she would tell him “Kya karen, Rajiv nahin manthe hai.” And Rajiv would likewise pass the buck to mother. But the tussle between Sonia men and Rahul’s is an actual inter-generational warfare. It will perish them and the party as well. Move is now afoot to untangle the Party from the Dynasty. In plain words, they might be told to leave the matters of the Party to a new set of leaders and leave. Its nature’s law: Dynasties come and go. Possibly it is the end for the Nehru-Gandhi Dynasty.

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